As Noses Go

Having escaped from the rest of the face,

The nose went skipping along.

Taking delight in every place

Where it knew it didn’t belong.

©2011 Cleggo

Morning Warmup

Skin-Tight Jeans

She squeezed into those skin-tight jeans.

The ones she wore back in her teens.

Then nature calls, and just her luck,

The rackin’ frackin’ zipper stuck.

©2011 Cleggo

Speedo

Uh, dude, about that Speedo...

Not that it doesn’t look good,

It’s just... some guys can pull it off,

And the rest of us... probably should.

©2011 Cleggo

Rapunzel

The young prince scaled the golden braid

Draped from Rapunzel’s head,

And shock of shocks, those lovely locks

Grew from her face instead. 

©2011 Cleggo

T-Rex

I believe paleontologists 

Made mistakes at the t-rex digs.

What they assumed were fossilized arms 

Were obviously petrified twigs.

©2011 Cleggo

Billy The Kid

Had he picked another line of work,

Say, accountant or librarian,

Billy the Kid might have become

Billy the Octogenarian. 

©2011 Cleggo

Hill O'Billy

They stowed away on Irish ships

Drinkin’ pints and gettin’ lucky.

And now, there's hillbilly leprechauns 

From North Georgia to Kentucky.

©2011 Cleggo

The Golden Rule

The Golden Rule is wonderful,

Although a tad simplistic. 

It fails to take into account

The sadomasochistic.

©2011 Cleggo

Comb On Over

He combed across his bald head

Every day without exception,

And soon became a master 

In the art of self-deception. 

©2011 Cleggo

Warmup Sketch

Hair

Wanda bleached her hair

And now she’s living in recluse. 

Her platinum blonde dream

Became a nightmare in chartreuse.

©2011

Bessie

Bessie was a milk cow

With a most amazing udder. 

Farmer John made millions on

Her milk and cheese and butter. 

Snack Time

Bovine Troubadour

T-Bone, the bovine troubadour 

Sang songs of the range in Montana. 

In the end, his “home on the range”

Was a self-cleaning, stainless Amana.

©2011 Cleggo

RoboChick

Walker

Here's a time-lapse of the initial sketch. (No sound)

Courtship

Swamp Grass

Surf Sup

Time Lapse

Here's a little time-lapse sketch created in Painter. (Turn on your sound.)

This sketch was done in ballpoint pen. I then scanned it into Photoshop to paint it.